Photo by Kevin H.
Today is 9/11. We all remember what we were doing the moment we learned we were under attack. It was scary. Really the scariest moment of my life. Not knowing what was going to happen next and if we were all going to be alright. I, thank god, didn’t know anyone who was anywhere that was attacked. I could not though, get in touch with any of my family who lived 6-8 hours from me. The phones lines were jammed. I was however, able to IM my mom on the Internet and speak to her. I wanted to go home. I wanted to jump in my car and go home to my mom. It was the strangest, scariest feeling. I sat in front of the TV, motionless, in shock as the events unfolded. The 2nd tower was hit and the planes were going down. The towers began to fall and we all watched as New York City became covered in ash. We watched as the cameramen tried to outrun the ash coming at them and watched our screens go black until the dust settled. When it cleared, we watched as people in shock, walked the streets, crying and looking for their loved ones, for help, for anything. They were lost, as we were all lost.
I prayed and I prayed hard that day – for god to let us all be OK. I went to church that night to a prayer service. It wasn’t my church, but I didn’t care. I didn’t know what to do or where to turn. I knew that I had to pray and be with others. I found comfort in that small group of people that night.
We all questioned what life would be like from that day on. Would it ever be the same? Would there be numerous attacks on us? Would we ever feel safe again? It was something that no one could answer. Then came the anthrax scare. It was everywhere and people were dying. It seemed as if we were going under. But we didn’t. As in any tragedy, we eventually get up and dust ourselves off and get back on with our lives. We feel weird doing so. Like we are being disrespectful to those who were lost or those who are left behind fighting for us. But, that’s how life is. We have to move on and we have to be strong. We have to do it for ourselves, our families and as in this case, our country.
We remember what life was like before 9/11 and we remember what life was like after. Looking back over the past 8 years, I remember the major life changing events that have happened in my life since that day. I think that date was a defining moment in life for all of us.
Since 9/11 I have….
- Buried my mother
- Taken in my sister who was 18 at that time
- Became a retail store manager
- Quit my job as a Massage Therapist
- Got engaged
- Became the Executive Director for a Chamber of Commerce
- Bought a house
- Got married
- Had two miscarriages
- Had a daughter
- Lost my job
- Became a childcare provider
- Had a son
- Sold a house
- Bought a house
- Moved to a new city
- Started a blog
- Won an awesome photo contest
- Started my daughter in Pre- School
Each year when this day rolls around, I get a sick feeling in my stomach. I know that the most horrible day in my life is right around the corner. The day my mom passed away. I lost her on Halloween, unexpectedly. I was 23, had a sister who was a senior in High School and a brother who was in Kindergarten. It was undoubtedly, the worst day of my life.
So each year, I have two dates to remember what life was like before they happened. 9/11 and the passing of my mom. They seem to go hand in hand because they happened so close together. It’s tough. It does get easier each year. It’s been 8 years, but I never, ever forget all the details of those two days that changed my life forever.
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I understand how hard it is to lose a loved one, my grandmother passed away almost 9 years ago now. Hard to believe, and I don’t know if it gets easier persay, but, it does get better to deal with. What a wonderful post. ((HUGS))
Yes, you’re right – it’s not really easier, just easier to deal with.
Thank you for opening up to us like this. A lot has happened in your life in these 8 years. I am so sorry for the loss of your Mom.
Thank you, Sara. It is amazing to look back and see all that has happened in a time frame such as this. It’s amazing to see what all has changed in just a year!
I sort of understand where you’re coming from on this. My grandfather had died in June 2001, two days before I gave birth to my oldest son. I was in the throes of grief for him and postpartum depression when 9/11 happened.
I like how you listed all you’ve been through since then. It’s amazing isn’t it? My DH and I were listing major country and world events, and I’m still coming up with ones we forgot this morning.
Amanda, it seems that 2001 was rough year for us all. Everyone was in shock and grieving for a long time over all the events that had taken place and throw another shocker on top of it all…well, it wasn’t good. I remember the 1st anniversary of 9/11 – it was another sad time, but it was nice to see that we had all made it and that life was moving on.
Yes, life goes on. It’s what we do. It’s what we must do. I am sorry to hear of the loss of your Mom just 6 weeks after 9/11. How awful!
That day was our generation’s Pearl Harbor. It was the day we lost our innocence that we were safe from attack on American soil. I still have a very strong reaction to 9/11. And for some reason it gets stronger each year.
HUGZ hunny. I lost my Dad November 13, 1992. It never gets easier, just easier to deal with. As the time passes you will remember less of the pain of the loss and more of the good memories of your Mom. But it takes a very long time. It took at least 12 years for me.
9/11…we must NEVER forget.
9/11…I Still Remember. I Cannot Forget
You’re right…it’s just easier to deal with. Good way of putting it. I just hate that it’s so close to another tragedy and on a holiday. Maybe it wouldn’t matter what day it was on…it will always be a sad day.
This time of year is rough for me as well. Lost my sister-in-law at the beginning of October. Sorry for you loss. Time moves on, but we may still feel raw.
Corina – Down to Earth Mama´s last blog ..To Sweetie
So true Corina. Thanks for the nice thoughts.
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