11 Years Today – I Miss You Mom

Today marks 11 years since my Mom was called to Heaven.  11 years.  It’s so hard to believe.  Sometimes it feels like it was just yesterday and other times it feels like another lifetime ago.  I miss her so much.  I miss her more and more each day.  I miss that she’s not here to see my babies grow up or to help me with them.  I miss that she wasn’t here for my sister’s wedding.  I miss that she’s not here to read my blog and Facebook with me.  She would have LOVED that.  She was so artsy.  She loved drawing and painting. She was an amazing artist and was into home decor and always had a project going on in our house and most times, someone else’s.  She was the best friend ever.

Sometimes I feel like she’s close to me and actually feel like she’s going to walk into the room at any moment.  Sometimes I get chills when I answer the phone and hear her voice in my sister’s voice.  It’s an uncanny resemblance.  Sometimes when I look into my brother’s eyes, I see her. Sometimes I see her at a store and realize when she turns around it’s someone else.  Sometimes when Neil Diamond or John Denver comes on the radio at the perfect time and reminds me that she is close.  Sometimes I hear Ella playing and get flashbacks of me as a child playing with her.  Sometimes Andrew smiles and I see her.  Sometimes Sydney looks at me like I am the most amazing person in the world, and I thank my mom for teaching me to be a good mom. It’s those moments that helps me to remember her and to feel her close.

It’s times like this that I have to remember where she is and that she’s in a better place than we are.  I have to remember that God has a plan and that plan included Mom going home sooner than I would have liked.  I have to remember it’s all in His perfect timing.  I have to remember that He WAS in control that day and IS in control on  this day and that I will see her again one day.

I miss you Mom.